Before every film I’ve watched for the last several months, there has been one trailer I couldn’t escape from. Film after film, I was instructed to brace myself for the cinematic event of 2024, “Argylle.” Matthew Vaughn’s latest film became a staple of cinema meme culture, as many jokingly speculated the hyped-up identity of the real Agent Argylle. Unfortunately for Vaughn, the memes, which continuously mocked the film’s generic, uninspired appearance, were superior to the final product.
“Argylle” is tonally incoherent, overstuffed and largely unfunny. The film isn’t completely devoid of life, but its occasional creative momentum and energetic action sequences can’t save it from chaotic disarray.
Elly Conway (Bryce Dallas Howard) is a famous espionage writer living a quiet life. When the events of her novels begin to mirror the operations of a real-life spy syndicate, she is thrust on a swashbuckling world tour, accompanied by her cat Alfie and special agent Aidan Wilde (Sam Rockwell). Together, they must stay one step ahead of evil as the fine line between fiction and reality starts to blur.
Structurally, the film flails and fails. The plot is overly convoluted in the most unnecessary way possible. It’s not that it’s particularly confusing — everything is routinely spelled out for the viewer — it’s the film’s over-reliance on twists and turns. I can excuse the film’s central twist, as predictable as it is, but the constant curveballs became exhausting. When the stakes aren’t realized, and the end result is obvious from the jump, there’s no reason to inflate the runtime with hollow convolution.
I’m not typically one to complain about a long movie; if it can keep me locked in, extra minutes are a treat. “Argylle,” however, is too dull and run-of-the-mill to warrant such a bloated feature. The film might entertain in its ridiculousness, but it doesn’t execute any element well enough to capture my undivided attention.
With a movie like this, my greatest hope is that it doesn’t take itself too seriously. Action, cheesy romance and silly comedy can only mesh if the film commits to and recognizes its unserious nature. “Argylle” has trouble picking a route to follow. Elly Conway’s story and her relationship with Aidan Wilde felt overblown. Any attempt at emotional pay-off feels out of place amongst ludicrous comedy and action sequences. Perhaps the tonal incoherence would feel more natural if the characters were more interesting and the comedy less lazy.
I was, however, able to garner some enjoyment from the action sequences. Vaughn’s direction is creative and energetic enough for a flourishing fight scene. The editing during some of these sequences, utilizing a playful gimmick, is interesting but ultimately a touch distracting; the soundtrack for these scenes was annoying and nauseating. Even at its best, “Argylle” makes some questionable decisions.
The visual effects are truly awful throughout. Do the filmmakers realize that landscapes exist? You don’t need a greenscreen for the mountains of Colorado or the French countryside. Even when it tries to play with color, the product turns out ugly.
The cast is chock-full of stars, including Samuel L. Jackson, Henry Cavill, Bryan Cranston, Catherine O’Hara, John Cena, Dua Lipa and Ariana DeBose. They all do a decent job with the material they’re given, and I don’t doubt they had fun, but nobody is particularly memorable. Clearly, the film poured a significant portion of its budget into recruiting big names for marketing.
Between its uninspired visuals, inflated runtime and messy plot structure, “Argylle” is another generic blockbuster. Though it’s still a source of consistent entertainment, its scattered bright spots can’t overcome an overall disorganized experience.
