ASUO elections begin today: Are you ready to prove your loyalty to the Democratic process?
Today kicks off my third ASUO election since arriving at the University, and I feel familiar enough with the process now to impart some wisdom to those of you not in the know.
If you’re a freshman, and thought this sort of high-minded pageantry came and went with high school, I apologize, as you’re in for a rude awakening. Dozens of students as we speak are lining streets across campus, armed with fake smiles and colored flyers, hard at work and ready to annoy you for the next week-and-a-half. Will their work make a positive impact on our quality of life? Probably not. Will it look good on their resumes? You bet.
Let’s do a quick recap: In a robust showing of civic engagement, nearly one-fifth of the campus population turned out to vote last year. Riding the strength of 52 percent of 20 percent of University students, Emily McLain and Chii-San SunOwen assumed the role of ASUO Executive, where by most accounts they performed their duties admirably.
But the winds of change are blowing, my friends. In a heady scheme to avert despotism, all appointees serve just one-year terms. Meaning it is time for some new faces in the ASUO. Now I could spend all day comparing and contrasting the various political philosophies of student senate candidates, so for the sake of my time and your sanity I’ll keep this analysis to the three candidates for ASUO Executive.
Kari Herinckx and Jesse Hough are running for the executive, but are already winners in my book for coming up with the most inexplicable name for a slate – Rock the Yellow. There are at least two reasons why I don’t understand this name: 1. How do you go about “rocking” a color? And: 2. What did yellow do to anyone? As of today neither Kari nor Jesse have answered this question to my satisfaction.
Then we have Sam Dotters-Katz, Johnny Delashaw and the Oregon Action Team. On the surface, it appears they have everything needed for a successful campaign: a professional-Web site; a strange RV-type thing parked outside the EMU; 25-cent pizza slices. Did I mention their sweet Web site?
Finally we have Drew Cattermole – the Ron Paul of our election, if you will – running without the aid of a slate, or even a running mate. Cattermole, a contributor for the Oregon Commentator, has virtually no chance of winning. Yet his candidacy appeals to me. Whatever his platform, it’s his and his only. I’m not entirely sure I’d want him representing our campus, but at least I’d know where to file my grievances if I felt I wasn’t being represented.
I’ll never be convinced these slates have any place in student elections. They just reek of groupthink. And while they may not be the death nell for the ASUO, it’s kind of annoying that someone should have to think a certain way in order to align themselves with a larger group. What for? Protection?
You can learn about Rock the Yellow’s platform on their Web site, rocktheyellow.com. You can do the same for the Oregon Action Team at sam4asuo.com. But I’m going to save you some trouble. They’re differently worded versions of the exact same thing. And this is my real gripe with slates. Rock the Yellow wants students to be “informed about the money we pay into the incidental fee,” while the Oregon Action Team thinks, “Every single dollar should stay on campus to benefit you.” Rock the Yellow wants to promote sustainability across campus; so does the Oregon Action Team. Rock the Yellow opposes Tasers for DPS officers; so does the Oregon Action team. Rock the Yellow wants to turn out voters for the 2008 presidential election; so does the Oregon Action Team.
Do you remember reading Lord of the Flies? This is like the part where Jack and Ralph formed separate tribes, and each tried to convert the rest of the kids to their side. Remember how that turned out for Piggy? Well we students are like Piggy. All we want is some effective leadership and representation. But all this unnecessary showmanship is a real turnoff.
So vote for whomever you want. You can learn about their platforms and vote for the team that best represents you. You can blindfold yourself and throw a dart at a board with pictures of the candidates on it. Or, if you really want to be a part of something, don’t vote at all. Judging by last year’s turnout, there’s a movement that’s alive and going strong.
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