‘Tis the season — but not just for brightly wrapped presents, Christmas lights and a break from school.
For many people, the holidays present a time of frenzied shopping, trips to visit relatives and stress, stress, stress.
For some families, the stress of financial strain, extended periods of time indoors and hyper children home from school can bring the holiday season to the boiling point, where love and festivities are the last things on a person’s mind.
“During the holidays, the number of family problems go up,” said Christel Thomas, volunteer coordinator at Eugene’s White Bird Clinic. “People feel stressed out and we tend to take things out on the people we care about.”
However, help is near, and it’s not clad in a furry red suit.
The White Bird Clinic is just one of several places families can seek help if the holiday season becomes too much to bear. White Bird offers a 24-hour crisis line and crisis intervention. These services are not only for families experiencing tough times, but also for individuals who are lonely or depressed during the holidays or at any other time of the year.
“We play up the holidays as a time for families to be together,” Thomas said. “It’s a hard time for individuals whose families didn’t work — abusive or dysfunctional families.”
Financial problems can also be a strain on the holidays, Thomas said, with a lot of pressure to buy and provide, something many families can’t do. And for working parents, conflicts between full-time jobs and arranging activities for children while school is out can also be frustrating.
“It’s important to get out,” said Sandra Otsyula, site leader of the Eugene Family Resource Center. “The worst thing for everyone is to be stuck in the house. That’s a recipe for friction.”
Making use of community activities for children — such as the Eugene family calendar, the public library or the Eugene Parks and Recreation Program — can alleviate stress for both parents and children.
Without the stimulus of school, kids need to get out, Otsyula said, so bundle them up and take them outdoors.
The Eugene Family Resource Center, located at Patterson Elementary School, 1510 W. 15th Ave., also offers activities for families during the break in addition to its regularly scheduled parenting classes and activities. During Christmas break, the center will offer sandwich lunches open to the community from 11:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. from Dec. 20 to 22 and from Dec. 26 to 29. It also offers a family night every Wednesday from 6:30 p.m. to 8 p.m.
Regardless of financial or family circumstances, one of the most important tips for the holidays is to simplify and take time for yourself, said Steve Allanketner, executive director of and psychologist at Options, a private, non-profit counseling center. Not overwhelming oneself with multitudes of family events, social plans and travel can be one of the easiest ways to simplify.
“People need to take time for themselves and not get so caught up in the family network that they don’t take care of themselves,” Allanketner said. “Also, the holidays are a good time to practice moderation in drinking and partying.”
By simplifying plans and using activities and support for families, experiencing that holiday feeling may be a little easier, Thomas said.
“Spend time with your family and focus on the little things,” Thomas said. “Be really gentle with each other.”