“It takes two to speak the truth: one to speak and another to hear.”— Henry David Thoreau
Where will you be tonight?
I hope you will find yourself in the community. Walk with us and take back the night.
Since 1979, the community has come together in Eugene. We stand together in solidarity: survivors of sexual violence and allies. Until we embrace a world without sexual violence in a community of gender equality, until we end the hate crime known as rape (and it can be ended), until then, we come together, we walk together, we speak out, and we listen.
It is a brief journey of tremendous audacity, whenever we pass from isolation
to community.
What is your truth? No one can answer this for you, though we will come together tonight and we will leave with the truths of one another echoing in our lives.
My own truth is the truth of one survivor of childhood sexual abuse. These words have never been easy to write. Memories creep in.
For many years, I carried such experiences with me in silence. I became an attorney and sued perpetrators and institutions who enabled them. I obtained recompense for survivors of abuse from individuals, churches and educational institutions. The settlements and awards had a significant impact on the institutions. Generating corporate incentives for better protections was rewarding, but wholeness for survivors, including myself, was still elusive.
I began to understand: Community opens doors to healing. Community is not a university, a club or a religious group. Community is never defined by geography or corporate charter. Community emerges when we choose to be open. Community is the lover and partner who hears. It’s the friend who offers (needed and wanted) help. It is the advocate who speaks out of truth with the survivor, for advocacy must be survivor-centered to be effective.
Community. Tonight, the choice is yours.
From time to time, I have wondered, here at the University, is community possible?
Here, we can be very out of balance. I began this letter before the SASS contract was signed. It is extremely gratifying that SASS is officially back on campus. I mean that without irony, but let’s do it again — sign for next year, while somebody still has pen in hand. We simply cannot afford delays on contracts for survivor services on campus.
We need a change in culture reflecting greater affirmation of gender equality. A culture where sexual violence prevention is at least as central as a game we know as the “Civil War.” Where the imperatives of gender equality, sexual violence prevention and survivor services are reflected in our budget, media and priorities. We have good people in every area: students, staff, faculty and administrators. But we have a long way to go.
So, again, is community possible?
That question can only be answered by you. Where will you be tonight?
I hope that you will find yourself in the community. I hope that you will walk with us and take back the night.
Walk, friends. Walk, advocates. Walk, lovers. Walk, administrators, faculty and allies. Walk, heroic leaders at the University: the Women’s Center’s professional and student staff, SWAT, LGBTQA. Walk, all who work for gender equality and survivor-centered response and prevention. Walk with someone you care about, someone you don’t know, someone you need to hear, someone who needs to hear you.
Walk, survivors. Know you will be heard.
Where will you be tonight?
Shatter the silence. Take back the night.
[email protected]
Join the community, hear the truth
Daily Emerald
April 28, 2010
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