Xanax and underwear
A woman in Memphis, Tenn., called the police on Wednesday when she saw her son looking in her bra to find Xanax she had been hiding from him. The police found the 28-year-old man hiding under an SUV at the neighbor’s house. Police proceeded to search the man’s room where he had various other drug paraphernalia. The man had 22 Xanax pills on his person, 15 of which were wrapped in toilet paper and hidden in his sock.
Pigs and panzerfausts
Two pigs in Dresden, Germany, were searching for food on Friday when they uncovered a buried German panzerfaust, an anti-tank weapon used in WWII. The owner of the swine returned them to their pen and called the police, who dug up the weapon and destroyed it. The panzerfausts were especially used during the defense of Germany in the later years of the war.
The little engine that could
Amtrak is developing a revolutionary new fuel source that could solve our energy needs forever: biofuel derived from cow fat. A test program with a Federal Railroad Administration grant of $274,000 is exploring the renewable resource, using the Heartland Flyer train as the guinea pig. The train, which runs daily from Oklahoma City to Fort Worth, Texas, will be using 80 percent diesel fuel and 20 percent biofuel made from rendered beef fat. According to Amtrak, the biofuel reduces hydrocarbon and carbon monoxide emissions by 10 percent and particle emissions by as much as 15 percent.
Jalape-NO
Patrick “Deep Dish” Bertoletti won last Sunday’s La Costena “Feel the Heat” Jalapeño Eating Championship Challenge in San Antonio, Texas. After spending hours downing milk, milkshakes and antacids, Bertoletti devoured an eye-popping 275 jalapeño peppers in just 10 minutes. Whew! Just imagine the stinging sensation he felt the next day.
Plumbers crack B-GON
Tired of pondering the exposure of your posterior? Fearful every time you bend over to pick up a pencil? Try the new “Backtacular” butt patch, a custom-made denim patch that protects your modesty and your fashion sense. Kimberly Brewer, a California clothing designer, decided to market the patch when she got tired of her favorite jeans slipping whenever she sat down. “I’m not a fan of plumber’s crack, and I got tired of exposing mine and looking at others’. I thought to myself, ‘How can I alleviate this problem?’” These fashion accessories are available in plain denim and rhinestone designs, for an affordable $14.99.
Stupid DUI tricks
If you’re going to get a DUI, the least you can do is finish your damn drink! In Belleview, Fla., 61-year-old Dana Seaman was pulled over after his car was seen swerving. He said he had been drinking and agreed to take a sobriety test, but before he took the test, Deputy Eric Larson said he saw Seaman drink from a cup and toss it under the passenger seat. Larson said it smelled strongly of alcohol. Seaman was charged with a DUI — but at least he wasn’t charged with a party foul.
Roof romp raises ruckus
After living on his roof for four days, Jeremy Lesniak, of Randolph, Vt., came down from it. Hoping to raise awareness about child abuse, the owner of Vermont Computing Inc. decided to conquer his fear of heights by living on his roof armed with a tent, a canopy, a portable toilet and meals paid for by the community. He kept a live Facebook and Twitter stream during his roof-top vacation so supporters could keep up with all the action.
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Wednesday’s wild and weird
Daily Emerald
May 4, 2010
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