Pat Henschel and Terry Donahue fell in love with each other in 1947 when the two met on a Sunday morning at a hockey rink. Pat was 18 and Terry was 22–and they have been together ever since. Living together in secret under the guise of being best friends, roommates and, at times, cousins, they have kept their love hidden. Not before they’d spent more than 60 years together did they come out to their family.
“A Secret Love,” directed by Chris Bolan, is Netflix’s latest documentary, which hails from producers Ryan Murphy, known for creating “American Horror Story” and Jason Blum, known for his production company Blumhouse that specializes in horror films like Jordan Peele’s critical and commercial hit “Get Out.” Far from a horror film, this documentary tells a touching story that follows Terry and Pat as they reflect on their life together and prepare for the next leg of their journey together.
As Terry’s health declines and living alone becomes harder, the two are faced with the need to move to an assisted living community. This life change is a big point of contention between Pat and Terry’s family.
Pat and Terry have lived their life together, but independent of others. Pat has only had primarily Terry in her life, whereas Terry has family in Canada. The rift between Pat and Terry’s niece Diana is the main source of tension in the film as the two, despite decades of being connected through Terry, never felt that one genuinely cared for the other.
A major point of interest in this documentary is getting Pat and Terry’s perspective on history as they experienced it as a lesbian couple in the ’50s. Terry played baseball professionally for four years with the Peoria Redwings in the All-American Girls Professional Baseball League, where she learned about lesbians but didn’t understand until she met Pat and they fell in love. The two worked together at an interior design firm where they dressed the part so to speak, wearing dresses and makeup and getting dressed up in a fashion they typically wouldn’t. They socialized at house parties with close friends because gay bars where the focus of police raids where those in attendance would be publicly outed in the press and often lost jobs, lost custody of children or even were driven to suicide.
The documentary does a wonderful job incorporating home videos and photos to go deeper into their history and give an idea of the two early in their relationships, offering the viewers a peek into the house parties or a look at Terry on the baseball field. Old letters and poems with the names ripped off to conceal their identities reveal some of their more personal words to each other. In many ways, the film is an ode to their love story as it gives the audience a chance to hear about an over 70-year-long connection, as well as let the two of them express openly and publicly the love they shared in secret for 60 years.
“A Secret Love” is a charming story of two women and one of struggle as they try to adjust to a life where they can no longer remain fully independent of help and Pat must let other people in to their lives. It’s a valuable and rare look into a past that few other people can offer first person accounts of anymore. The story of Pat and Terry is one of love that after decades of hiding is finally free for the world to appreciate.