When the United States attacked Iraq, Tonya Claxton, a working mother in Eugene, experienced many different emotions. At first, she watched television most of the day to get updates, but eventually this took a toll on her.
“The first week, I thought I was going to have a breakdown,” Claxton said.
Since then, she has watched updates less frequently, but is still upset every time she hears a Marine has died.
Claxton’s youngest son, Pfc. Adam Taylor, a machine gunner serving in the 1st Marine Division, 4th Battalion, is now somewhere in the Middle East — probably somewhere in Iraq.
“I feel like I have a cloud of fear over me continually,” Claxton said.
Taylor, 19, joined the U.S. Marine Corps in June 2002, but has been interested in the military since attending the Pioneer Youth Corps., a military-style charter school in Eugene. He arrived in Kuwait on Feb. 14, and Claxton said she thinks Taylor is now near Saddam City, Iraq. She hasn’t heard from him in three weeks, and doesn’t even know if he has seen combat.
“He’s very excited and not scared at all,” Claxton said. “He’s always had a strong positive attitude. He wanted the war to start to just get it over with.”
In a letter dated Feb. 28, Taylor expressed enthusiasm about the future.
“I’m sure I will see combat soon, but I have a lot of trust in my leaders and in my own ability — physically and mentally. I’m not scared, so don’t you all worry. It’s really sandy out here, my nose is all stuffed up with dirt — it’s awesome, yeah! … We’ve been told that we will be home in August or September.”
In another letter, dated March 8, Taylor wrote that the war was about to begin:
“Before you get this, I will have already crossed into Iraq and attacked the city. I hope the Iraqi people will be subtle with their decisions and not get people killed. I’m sure the attack will be over the news. We will be only five miles away when the bombs strike. I believe the key word for when the bombs strike is when President Bush gives his speech and ends it with ‘God bless America and God bless the troops.’ So if he says that, I’m sure Iraqis will hear a big bomb. … We took showers the other day at Camp Metilda — it was great, but an hour later we were all dusty again.”
Taylor’s oldest brother Mike Taylor, 21, said it is awkward having his youngest brother fighting in Iraq because he has never had anyone close to him involved in a war before.
“Some nights I think about him a lot, but other nights I know he is all right,” Mike Taylor said.
Claxton said she has not slept well for more than three weeks, and besides fearing for her son’s safety, she is also angered with the U.S. and Iraqi governments because of their inability to coexist peacefully.
“We have come so far with technology — it just seems hard that we still have to go to war,” she said.
But she said she realizes that war might sometimes be the only solution, and she supports the American troops and the reason the war is being fought.
“I’m excited for the Iraqi people,” she said, adding that she is pleased to see images of Iraqi people praising troops. “I don’t agree with war, but it is something that has to be done.”
Still, Claxton’s first priority is her son, and she said she wants him to come home as soon as possible.
“Every time they say a Marine has been killed, your heart flips,” she said. “Some parents have gotten the word (that their son or daughter was killed), and you worry you are going to be some of those parents. It’s more personal this time with my son being over there,” she said.