When junior Hanna Persson was in high school, she was lonely, seemingly isolated from her peers and the rest of society. She didn’t look or sound like a “typical” Southern Californian. Part Chilean and part Swedish, she has light blue eyes and a dark complexion. She also spent part of her life in Sweden and has a noticeable accent.
But what isolated Persson wasn’t her appearance or voice, she said — it was her sexuality.
“I ended up coming out to my parents first because I thought they would be OK, but they weren’t,” she said. “My parents told me there’s no way that I’m queer because only people who have horrible things happen to them are queer or gay. They ended up giving me therapy to straighten me out.”
Things didn’t get “straightened out,” however. Therapy didn’t make her heterosexual, nor did it fix her badly bruised relationship with her parents.
“My dad ended up yelling at me every night for half a year about being gay,” she said.
A couple of days after telling her parents she was gay, her mother suggested she be baptized and confirmed, even though she had never been to church.
Persson protested.
Six years later, Persson’s parents remain uncomfortable with her sexuality. But despite their reservations, they have maintained a relationship with her.
To Persson, that relationship is very important and is the reason behind why she’s debating whether to tell them that she wants to become a man.
“I’m still working on a relationship with them,” she said. “To come home with a girlfriend is one thing. To come home with a beard is quite a different thing.”
Persson does have some acceptance in her family. She’s found a sympathetic ear with her younger sister, Ellinor.
Persson said Ellinor knows she would like to become transgender and has always supported her.
“I think that if I were to come out as (transgender) to my parents that I would very possibly lose my relationship with them,” she said. “And I’m not sure if I’m ready for that or not yet.”
Persson’s fear of acceptance is common, said Chicora Martin, director of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Educational and Support Services Program. Martin said many times an individual has gone through the internal process of acceptance, but he or she still worries about how their coming out will affect their friendships and family relationships. Regardless of her fears of disappointing her family, Persson has managed to find acceptance.
She has worked for the Office of Student Life, the LGBTQA, the Multicultural Center, the Oregon Students of Color Coalition and others. She also helped start a group called Fusion, which is for LGBTQ people of color. Through those groups, Persson has found a group of peers with whom she can be comfortable. She now has lots of “good” friends, many of whom are transgender and many of whom are queer.
This Friday, gay students who have not revealed their sexuality — as well as those who have — will celebrate “Coming Out Day.” A rally will take place from 1:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m. in the EMU Amphitheater. More information about events leading up to Coming Out Day can be obtained from the Office of Student Life display case in the EMU.