Story and Photos by Alexandra Wallachy
Below a rotating disco ball on a warm Thursday evening survivors of sexual abuse shared their stories. The too often repeated phrase “before I knew it” yielded tears, outrage and pain. Under aliases and pseudonyms survivors spoke out against rape culture at a forum at Cozmic Pizza in downtown Eugene. The same message echoed over and over: it’s hard work to be a survivor.
UO Sexual Violence Prevention Week took place April 21-26, 2013. It was sponsored by the Women’s Center, the Men’s Center, the Sexual Wellness Advocacy Team (SWAT), the Alliance for Sexual Assault Prevention (ASAP), Sexual Assault Support Services (SASS), and a number of other campus groups. Take Back the Night is an international event that started in Belgium in 1976, and at the University of Oregon is a three-part event comprised of a rally, march and speak out. The week hosted a variety of events including the Consent is Sexy 5K, film screenings, bake sales, panel discussions, debriefs, keynote speeches, and the Take Back the Night rally, march, and speak out (TBTN).
Caitlin Corona, an employee of the Women’s Center and member of the TBTN planning committee, described the TBTN as “marching through the streets to say, ‘yes, we can be out at night without worrying about being sexually assaulted.’” The event is open to men, women and anyone who falls in between. Corona explains that the goal of TBTN at the University of Oregon is to “empower survivors and challenge rape culture in today’s society.”
Marching down Alder street, supporters of Take Back the Night were greeted with a mix of admiration and confusion at the chants of “yes means yes and no means no; however we dress, wherever we go” and “hey hey! Ho ho! Patriarchy has got to go!” The procession, closely followed by motorcycle police, arrived at Cozmic Pizza for the ‘Speak Out’ portion of Take Back the Night. The crowd then shifted their focus on the validity of all feelings and experiences shared that night.
The event explored the unfortunate myths that people who have experienced sexual violence are often up against, like:“If you press charges you’d be ruining his life”; “If you turn a guy on it’s your duty to satisfy him”; “Hey you did it once, you can do it again”; “You put yourself in that situation”; “It was your fault.”
Sexual Violence Prevention Week and Take Back the Night challenged such ignorant assumptions. Each brave participant stressed the importance of the event and sharing their experience, their resolves, and confessions: “I always thought it wasn’t that big of a deal… My deal now is getting rid of that”; “Your trauma is real to you, and that’s all that really matters”; “No doesn’t mean no if no is not an option”; “Every experience is different and valid.”
The intensity of the ‘Speak Out’ was reflected in the faces of the audience members. The wall-to-wall crowd was comprised of students and community members offering support and understanding.
“Attending the rally and march was a really empowering experience,” Coyote Omkara, a freshman at UO, says. “I think that sexual assault is something that people just brush off their shoulders, when it’s something that can happen to anyone.”
Events like Sexual Violence Prevention Week promote awareness while asking participants for more action. In his Wednesday April 24th lecture “Bad Boys and Bystanders: Silence and Violence in Male Culture” keynote speaker Dr. Jackson Katz claimed that sexual assault awareness is too passive.
“Yes we need awareness but we’ve had awareness for decades, how many decades are we going to have sexual assault awareness?” Katz asks in his speech. “We need action. We need much more than awareness. We need action; we need institutional leadership and political leadership and priorities and much more. If awareness is on the path to action then it’s a good thing, but awareness unto itself, not so much.”
Dr. Katz calls for a paradigm shift in our thinking about sexual violence. Katz argues that, “Part of the problem is calling gender violence issues women’s issues. Calling gender violence issues women’s issues gives men the excuse not to pay attention.” Katz then clarifies that, “Part of our goal, as those who want this paradigm shift, those who want more men engaged, those who want to see dramatic not marginal reductions in domestic and sexual violence, who know that men have to be part of this at every level… We need to be making visible what has been rendered invisible. We need to change the language; that’s the paradigm shift.”
Sexual Violence Prevention Week represents optimism and a call to action. The group of brave men and women committed to changing the culture that perpetuates violence and abuse is strong in its resolve. In the words of one brave survivor, “I hate rape culture. And I’m going to do everything in my power to change it.”
