Most professional columnists are able to spout long and complicated rants while leaning hard to either the right or left side of the political spectrum, preaching from the safety of an impressive office space located in the ivory tower of a respectable newsroom. These professionals are also able to use run-on sentences at will.
I am not claiming to be one of those professionals. In contrast, my preaching will be done from a small Macintosh in the armpit of the EMU.
Either by luck, hoax or divine intervention, I have become the new editorial editor for the Emerald, an independent publication that has come under fire over the years for its annoyingly liberal undercurrents.
Personally, I don’t know how to label myself politically. I have only one political philosophy that has been strengthened time and again in my two years here at the University: Practice what you preach.
I have found that most organized protests on campus are designed only to annoy people who are not in them. This epiphany was exemplified during the Worker’s Rights Consortium pro-test last year, when angry students fought for the rights of poor sweatshop workers while murdering thousands of innocent blades of grass under their Nike shoes and “Made in Korea” tents. The horror!
On the right hand, I don’t exactly have a framed picture of Ronald Reagan above my fireplace. And an eye for an eye will eventually leave the world blind, unless you look the other way.
Luckily for Emerald readers, this year we have assembled a roster of columnists who run the gamut of political and social labels for your ranting pleasure. Our purpose is not to alienate with holier-than-thou rhetoric, but to incite thoughtful discussion on issues pertinent to the University community.
I urge Emerald readers to continue to let us know how we’re doing, and if you haven’t been incensed by our commentary contents at least once by the end of the year, we’re not doing our jobs.
I look forward to the organized chaos. Sermon over.