Get ready for a new, exciting and frighteningly self-indulgent feature of the Pulse section: a weekly wrap-up of music and entertainment news, based solely upon what I think is interesting and worthwhile! Can you handle it? Then let’s begin …
For starters, let’s cover what is surely on the mind of everyone in America lately: the new Michael Jackson album. In case you’ve been living under a rock, Jacko’s “Invincible” will be hitting stores with a resounding “THWACK” on Oct. 30.
The album’s first single, the Rodney-Jerkins-produced “You Rock My World,” has been floating around the radio for a few weeks now, but cunning listeners will have noticed that another new song, the unbelievably saccharine ballad “Cry,” is available for listening at www.michaeljackson.com. Let’s hope that the rest of the album is a little more “Beat It” and a little less “Heal the World.”
Who doesn’t love J-Lo? Okay, maybe a lot of people don’t love J-Lo. But at least one person out there really loves the artist formerly known as Jennifer Lopez: Cris Judd, her choreographer. The happy couple tied the knot last Saturday. Be on the lookout for children with awesome butts and fly dance moves.
Remember Garbage? You know, the band that did “I’m Only Happy When It Rains?” The band whose drummer, Butch Vig, produced such classic albums as “Nevermind” by Nirvana and “Siamese Dream” by the Smashing Pumpkins? The band whose singer, Scottish chanteuse Shirley Manson, was dreamt about nightly by approximately 73 percent of U.S. teenage males from 1996 to 1998?
Yes, that band. This week Garbage released their third album, “beautifulgarbage.” In the humble opinion of this lowly entertainment reporter, the album pales in comparison to the first two.
In sadder news, let us all shed a tear for the demise of one of Britain’s coolest bands. Elastica bandleader Justine Frischmann revealed this week that the rocking girl group has split up in the wake of unsuccessful recording sessions earlier this year. Don’t despair completely, though. Elastica will release a farewell single in the near future.

Speaking of defunct bands, did you know the Smashing Pumpkins have a cartoon based upon the crazy concept behind their final album, last year’s “Machina/the Machines of God?” Neither did I, until I went to www.smashingpumpkins.com this week and saw a sneak preview of “Glass and the Machines of God.” It’s animated. It’s goth. It’s crazy. You know, for a band that called it quits last year, the Pumpkins are sure up to a lot these days, what with the pending releases of a retrospective DVD and a B-sides album.
Speaking of goth, the original Prince of Darkness, Ozzy Osbourne, will be touring with Rob Zombie and Mudvayne in support of his upcoming album. The tour was originally called “Black Xmas,” but after the events in New York last month Ozzy decided to call the outing “Merry Mayhem.” Chickens, bats and other small, winged animals are advised to stay away from Ozzy’s mouth if they decide to attend the show.
Many other musical acts have made changes in light of the terrorist attacks. The name of Bush’s big comeback single was changed from “Speed Kills” to the decidedly more optimistic “The People that We Love.” Emo-tastic rock wonderboys Jimmy Eat World have changed the title of their current single from “Bleed American” to “American.”
Some album covers that were meant to be released recently also have been held. Art-metal fiends Dream Theater had intended to release an album called “Live Scenes From New York,” with a cover featuring a burning New York City skyline. That album is currently on hold. Eeriest of all, the cover of the new album by Oakland hip-hoppers The Coup featured a bizarrely accurate picture of the Twin Towers exploding. The Coup immediately changed the album cover.
Finally, Dave Matthews Band opted not to release the song “When the World Ends” as their current single, opting instead for the uplifting title track from their latest album, “Everyday …”
While on the subject of Dave Matthews Band, please call them Dave Matthews Band. They are a “band.” Do not call them “Dave.” There are five people in Dave Matthews Band, and their singer has a perfectly good last name as well. It is “Matthews.” Please use it. The Daves of the world will thank you.