Rafael is a guy who likes his job a little too much – but he should. His job, ruling over the ladies’ section at a huge department store in Madrid, Spain, lets him do things like yell, “We’ll increase sales by 50 percent!” while having sex.
The movie “El Crimen Perfecto” revolves around Rafael’s life, mostly spent at Yeyo’s department store. He even claims to have been born in the accessories department.
The self-assured bachelor seeks the elegant life and strives to get what he wants. He’ll grab a beautiful stranger on the crosswalk for a quick make-out session or take a newspaper from the stand without paying. He translates his confidence onto his sales floor domain, persuading anyone to buy anything.
“I bought a basketball jersey, and I hate basketball. I have it framed in my room,” one colleague says of Rafael’s abilities.
His talent and suave demeanor also get him admiration from female co-workers. Every girl wants to have a good time in the dressing room with Rafael after closing hours as he dresses them up in fancy clothes taken off the rack, serves wine and tests out the beds.
Although Rafael has everything a male could want, his ultimate dream is to become the floor manager of Yeyo’s, apparently the mark of the elegant life.
To achieve his dream, he must battle his rival, men’s department head Don Antonio, for the coveted position.
But when Rafael is overlooked, he and Don Antonio clash in the dressing room, leading to the not-so-perfect crime in which Rafael accidentally hangs Don Antonio on a coat rack. The cocky salesman would probably delight in the accident if it weren’t for the fact that someone else saw the whole thing.
The witness is like the high school nerd nobody noticed – she’s an unattractive saleswoman Rafael didn’t even notice for the last 10 years named Lourdes.
She uses what she witnessed as power over Rafael, getting her revenge on the popular guy by demanding he be at her beck and call.
Rafael lives what he fears most. He has to bow down to Lourdes, meet her crazy family and is forced into marriage.
The movie, pegged as a dark comedy, provides a rare laugh and is a little slow. The audience doesn’t need to see scene after scene to understand just how miserable Rafael is. Perhaps much of the humor is lost from the Spanish tone or in the English subtitles.
However, the idea that Rafael seems to be ripped right from a men’s magazine is the most fun thing to watch as he puts together elaborate schemes to avoid Lourdes.
Somehow Spanish director Alex de la Iglesia gets the audience to sympathize with the self-absorbed Rafael as he suffers the life he dreaded.
The movie is an entertaining example of what people are willing to do to fit in. For Lourdes, it means chopping up a dead body and blackmailing without a guilty conscience.
While Rafael claims he wants to avoid the mediocre, ordinary lifestyle, he really has no idea what he wants. He merely goes after what society tells him he wants: hot babes and material objects.
Lourdes at least knows what she wants, although she goes about it in a haphazard way.
Although Lourdes and Rafael are exaggerated, the sales floor of Yeyo’s does let the viewer examine society’s pressures to be a certain way.
“El Crimen Perfecto” is now playing at the Bijou and is not rated. Viewers are cautioned for nudity and language. Check www.bijou-cinemas.com for show times.

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