It is every political science major’s favorite time: election year! It doesn’t matter if you specialize in international relations, law or U.S. politics: Come every four years, attention is diverted to the unique election cycle that demonstrates American (un)exceptionalism. Sometimes we are given exciting, stimulating and thought-provoking candidates running for office.
Sorry, America, this isn’t one of those times. As a preface, I generally tend to sway to the left but that doesn’t mean I’m against all conservative ideas or principles. And in a primary process so pathetic and sad, it isn’t hard for me to throw my hands up into the air at this entire field given what has happened so far.
The primary process has been nothing short of insane, Bizarro-World madness. I daresay it couldn’t get worse, barring some ridiculously over-the-top gay-sex scandal that apparently plagues Republicans exclusively. With some notorious anti-gay crusaders like Texas Gov. Rick “Parry”@@http://dailycaller.com/2011/08/13/colberts-ads-advocate-rick-parry-write-in-create-a-straw-poll-mess/@@ and Rick “Google-Problem” Santorum adamantly declaring that gay people are what’s wrong with America, it is clear that some of the candidates just don’t get it.
Hell, Perry has released two of the dumbest ads ever, of all-time; ads so laughably awful that it warrants the firing of whatever PR rep or marketing executive came up with them. The less infamous one where he makes light of his debate gaffe comes off as an attempt to appeal to a segment of America that wants their President to be “one of the guys” or an “average Joe.”
But Perry’s “Strong” ad takes the proverbial cake. The faux persecution displayed evokes feelings of satire and would be hysterical if not for the awesome display of bigotry (however, the numerous parodies of said ad more than make up for it). Perhaps the person who should be fired (if they haven’t already) is whoever uploaded it to YouTube without disabling the ratings, as it as quickly became one of the most-disliked videos of all time, surpassing such “artists” as Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black.
America only cared about what Rick Perry had to say because he is (who am I kidding, was) a candidate for President not named Mitt Romney. This may be the cause of all the mayhem that has permanently associated itself with this election cycle. We all knew that Romney would be the front-runner this time around. More importantly, Mitt Romney knew it and did nothing with this supposed advantage.
In fact, he appears to be in the lead in spite of himself. If Perry and Santorum don’t get it when it comes to gay rights, then Mitt must have been in a coma during the majority of 2011. To say he is out of touch with average working- or middle-class Americans is akin to calling Alaska a “little chilly” in winter.
This fact doesn’t seem to be lost on the people, however, which explains the musical chairs that, while in its infancy, provided plenty of fodder for late-night talk show hosts.
Remember when Michele Bachmann won the Iowa straw poll? No? OK. Well it happened, and now she is but a distant memory. How ’bout Herman Cain? Remember when conservatives trotted him out and declared, “and he’s black too!” He even tried to appeal to the youth demographic by ripping his tax plan straight out of SimCity 4.@@http://www.ea.com/simcity-4-deluxe@@
Sure enough, for a solid month all anyone could hear was talks of “9-9-9” which fittingly sounded more like a marketing campaign to sell more pizzas than to revamp the broken tax code. However, like many candidates before him, a sex scandal during his time with the other NRA (the National Restaurant Association) was enough to scuttle his bid.
Bachmann, Perry, Cain and now Santorum have all had their time in the limelight and all were poised to be the Republican candidate at one point. Now they all stand a distant third to Romney and the sometimes-ignored Ron Paul, a man who, again despite himself, has garnered a strong following of supporters — including the youth vote which, to this point, has eluded all other GOP candidates.
University of Washington junior Andy Mendoza, a self-described libertarian, describes Paul as the only candidate that seeks to “institute reform in terms of foreign policy affairs and place a bigger priority on states’ rights.”
For those who adhere to libertarian thought, it is an important step to have a candidate that shares those beliefs in contention for the U.S. presidency. Whether or not he actually has a chance, given how maligned he is by neoconservatives and the media, is up for debate.
As it stands now, if you are a conservative, you cannot be feeling good about this upcoming election. Can any of the candidates left actually beat Obama? At this rate, probably not. If the GOP, after three years of bitching and moaning about Obama and secret-Muslim-this and socialist-that, have only this to show for opposition, we should all get ready to have our first black two-term-serving president in history.
