Several letters to the editor and an editorial (“Are women nothing more than victims?” ODE, May 2) were published in the Emerald about Judge Mitch Crane’s speech on drinking responsibly. I did not attend this presentation, but I have heard enough to know Crane said nothing short of how our society views rape: As the fault of the survivor.
It’s a tragedy that rape is seen this way. The survivor is usually female. In my four years here at the University, I have been to countless presentations about rape. These presentations are dominated by females, usually listening to a male presenter give us safety tips. We are cautioned to watch our glass while at a bar or party, so that potential predators don’t slip a substance into our drink. We are asked to not get intoxicated in order to prevent sending mixed signals, to avoid being in a position where a predator can attack. Consequently, if we don’t follow these tips and something happens to us, it is our own fault. That’s what we get for drinking.
I don’t condemn these safety tips and am not suggesting that they shouldn’t be followed. They can stop a tragedy, promote awareness and possibly make the cruel intentions of a rapist more difficult to enact. I simply ask for the blame to fall where it belongs: On the predator.
Rape is a male issue. It affects both men and women, yet it starts with the male. If men didn’t rape, women wouldn’t be in danger.
While not every man will rape, every woman is a potential survivor. Many men would be appalled if asked not to rape or if asked to sit and listen to why rape is wrong, but I’m appalled as well.
I’m appalled that, according to statistics from the ASUO Women’s Center, one in 12 college men admit to acts that meet legal definitions of rape and that one out of every seven women currently attending college has been raped. I’m appalled that somewhere in America, a woman is raped every two minutes. I’m appalled that a woman is 10 times more likely to be raped than to die in a car crash.
I am appalled and saddened that my friend was raped.
My friend was raped. I was not able to protect her when she needed it most, and because of that my life has been touched, and I will never be the same. Survivors are not to blame for the actions of a predator, but our society assigns them the blame. Survivors take on this guilt and ask themselves why they deserve this act of violence. The answer is simple: There is nothing a person can do to deserve to be raped.
I would like speakers to come to campus and speak to male-dominated audiences about rape. I’d like presenters to explain that slipping drugs into a person’s drink is illegal and violating, to explain that a drunk or passed out woman has not given consent for sex, and to remind males that the University’s student conduct code states that an intoxicated individual cannot give consent to sex.
Presenters should explain that mixed signals are not really mixed if one listens. That no one wants to be raped. And that no means no.