“Thank you, Mrs. (pause) Kekeke…KEPner, is it?”
This type of thing may have happened to you too. In line at the grocery store, purchases made, you are handed your receipt. The clerk makes a “friendly” attempt to refer to you
by name.
“No, it’s Nepper,” I reply,
“like KNife.”
“Oh, sorry Mrs. Knee-per.”
I shrug. This is not worth a 20 minute conversation.
On to the video store.
“See ya back here Wednesday,
AnneMarie!”
I turn around. Funny, I didn’t recognize the girl when I was checking out. Did I go to high school with her? No way, she looks far too young. This is the first time I’ve ever seen this person in my life. But, apparently, we are on a first-name basis. And I won’t be seeing this stranger on Wednesday; I’m far too cheap for that. I’ll be back tomorrow for my dollar credit.
I first noticed this phenomenon three years ago. After ringing up my groceries at a local chain supermarket, the clerk asked me if I had a Club Card. I did indeed, and began to rattle off my phone number. The clerk interrupted me before I could finish, with a terse, “No, no, no, we don’t do that anymore. We have to scan the card.”
When pressed for details as to why, the clerk explained that the new company policy is to thank every customer by last name. Having a customer’s phone number spoken aloud followed by their last name was a privacy and safety risk. Makes sense. Except that the entire issue would be null if it weren’t for the policy of addressing customers by name.
I understand that these service workers are just trying to do their jobs. It would be vain and silly to believe that our 30 second exchange moved them to want to be my best friend. I’m sure management made the name usage decision. It’s possible the workers feel equally uncomfortable with the situation. So why are so many service providers jumping on the “proper name” bandwagon?
It seems to this customer that they are trying to create a false sense of familiarity, a “homey-ness,” in a cold warehouse-like setting. An instant bond between two strangers that, they hope, will result in repeat business with the customer.
Well I just can’t buy that. Here’s why: Giant chain stores are finally waking up to the fact that people crave intimacy. I believe people actually do want to feel at home in their neighborhood grocery store. They want a friendly environment in which they can shop. Bully for that. But the sad reality is that the “neighborhood corner grocery store” doesn’t exist anymore in most cities. Trying to create that feel by pretending that the store clerks actually know each individual customer is an exercise in futility, not to mention somewhat demeaning to the customer’s actual value as a human who deserves to
be known.
Instead of creating a genuine sense of community and friendliness by taking an interest in the customers’ more complicated needs, the service providers are taking the easy route, jumping past the whole paying attention thing and just reading the customer’s name off a computer. The result is far from the intention. The customer does not become a friend, or even a store patron. The customer becomes nothing more than a Club Card number.

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