Rock stars are so easy to love. They have those wavy, supple blonde locks atop their perfectly round heads, and from those heads spew forth such wonderful notes and words. And oh, those double-neck guitars — rock ‘n’ roll!
Yeah, right.
Earlier this summer, Mr. Lang titled this “The Summer of Rehab.” Mikey of Weezer, Mariah Carey, a Backstreet Boy and hunky Ben Affleck — who will probably start a band a la Keanu Reeves’ Dogstar and Russell Crowe’s 30 Odd Foot of Grunts — all dove into rehab, a.k.a. “a restful summer.”
But on a personal note, this has been Mr. Lang’s “Summer of Getting a Big, Fat Snub From Rock Stars.”
Just once, he wanted to snag an interview with a rock star, or at least a major act. Ani DiFranco and Jello Biafra were both too busy. With Soul Coughing dead, a promoter or publicity manager for Mike Doughty was impossible to find.
But then a breakthrough came from an unexpected source: Cake. With the band playing an Aug. 31 show at Portland’s Roseland Theater, the label was looking to drum up some college-student buzz with a savvy interview.
Mr. Lang was eager and interested, too. He was at Cake’s last Roseland show, where the band was more than 45 minutes late taking the stage and gave no reason or apology for their extreme tardiness. The incident was the subject of a previous column.
The interview would serve both Mr. Lang’s desire to interview a major label act and exorcise the demons of a past show with some serious “Lucy-you-gots-some-explainin’-to-do” questioning.
An interview … over the phone … not with the entire band … not with borderline egomaniac frontman John McCrea … with trumpet player Vince DiFiore.
The choice seemed fitting for the summer of rock star snubs, and he would be able to speak for the band as a whole.
But what would be more fitting? For DiFiore not to call at all and the label representative to take off on vacation, of course. Yes, it did happen. This isn’t a scenario.
Granted, a lot of things could have happened. Perhaps DiFiore had a personal emergency. Maybe he just plum forgot. Mr. Lang once left some vacation photos in a Murphy’s Grill in Dallas, Ore., and had to make an embarrassing reappearance the next day to retrieve them.
Also granted, this is mostly just a frustrating situation, and DiFiore still has the best hair in the group.
But his thoughts on the new album, Portland, Eugene and his ability to take Dizzy Gillespie in a fight — those answers may never be known.
On a lighter note, this summer has been a musical melee of news, shows, upcoming acts, and, like most summers, a touch of legitimate tragedy. What with Mr. Lang’s love of the Top 5 List, he now presents the Top 5 Summer Happenings:
1. The Summer of Rehab — So big, it’s worth two mentions in the same column. So many stars went down this summer. Who would have thought Robert Downey Jr. jokes would go out of fashion so quickly.
2. Sleater-Kinney accolades, concert — Time Magazine named the Oregon/Washington riot grrl group Sleater-Kinney “America’s Best Rock Band.” The list of “bests” included flavors of the month such as Ang Lee for best director and Julia Roberts for best actress. But the magazine demonstrated mature foresight by selecting SK even though the band has not released an album in a year.
The band also came out of a nine-month concert hiatus in August to play two shows: a warm-up in Portland and a Seattle show opening for Patti Smith. Despite the time off, the band hadn’t lost a chord and demonstrated on stage that one reason they deserve their “best band” status is because they get actual enjoyment from playing live and take seriously the call to entertain the crowd with their music.
3. Aaliyah’s death — When celebrities die, it’s an odd balancing act. On one hand, there’s a sense that the plane crash that killed a total of nine people became more tragic when a famous name ended up on the passenger list, and so the incident should be downplayed. On the other hand, there’s a feeling to make her larger than life and overdo her fame. Neither truly seems like the right reaction when something this bizarre and random occurs. But facts remain. A talented 22-year-old woman died, which is tragic whether her talents were known locally, nationally or only to herself.
4. They Might Be Giants — One thing about the Eugene Celebration organizers: They know how to pick headliners that entice a celebratory mode. Last year, Cherry Poppin’ Daddies energized the crowd. Now, They Might Be Giants embody the intelligent, semi-nerdy and college crowd mentalities all at the same time.
5. Eminem wakes the dead — An England woman claimed her daughter came out of a coma after the mother played Eminem’s music for her. The girl had fallen into a light coma after a car crash, and her mom said the girl listened to Slim Shady “on the ghetto blaster” every night before bed.