Opinion: At the risk of sounding old fashioned, let’s all get used to talking to each other again.
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It’s something we all grew up with: warnings from teachers and relatives about “stranger danger.” For as long as I can remember, I’ve known that I should absolutely not under any circumstances get in a stranger’s car to get free candy or look for a lost puppy.
Those warnings shaped my interactions with strangers for most of my life, and even now, I don’t approach people I don’t know unless it’s strictly necessary. I wonder now, though, should we really assume that every interaction with a stranger will be negative or even dangerous?
The clear answer is no. It makes no sense to walk through life afraid of talking to anyone when you could be having interesting conversations instead. As a lifelong introvert, I can’t pretend that the idea of constantly being expected to talk to people thrills me, but I also don’t like wallowing in fear as a general rule. I propose a happy medium of being perfectly willing to talk to strangers but not necessarily seeking the opportunity out. This has been my strategy this term and it’s working nicely.
Although I’ve only recently started regularly putting it to use, this idea has been brewing in my head since last spring. I was finally done with a presentation in my science class so I decided to relax outside for a few minutes before heading home. I had just started playing a song when an older gentleman sat down and started talking to me. I usually hate being interrupted when I’m playing music, but he called my Converse “old school” so I was immediately a fan. We ended up talking for half an hour about the Rolling Stones, and I came away from the conversation feeling thrilled to have found someone with a similar interest.
Since then, I’ve started working at a job that puts me directly in contact with the general public in a way I’ve never been before. At first, I was completely astounded by the way strangers would just come up to me and seemingly say anything. Now it’s more of a source of amusement.
Most people just ignore me when I’m working, so the ones who start conversations are always memorable. Standouts so far include the man who said “have a nice day, young lady, and do something positive” and the student who did a handspring on the sidewalk in front of me and then talked about wanting to be a National Geographic photographer.
When these interactions started, I narcissistically assumed I was just such a magnetic person that people couldn’t resist talking to. Luckily, I got confirmation that this happens to other people from UO students such as lifeguard Katie Fendick.
“Most of the time, I’m just around and then someone’s like, ‘I’m going to tell you everything about my life,’” she said regarding her hours working at her pool’s front desk. “People just like telling stories and then you’re there and you listen to them.”
This matches my experience exactly, and I’ve noticed that these random conversations are often the highlight of my day. I’m not really advocating a complete disregard for stranger danger (but I had to pique your interest in this article somehow, right?) and you should obviously avoid someone if you feel unsafe. I know we don’t live in a perfect world and every interaction could carry some amount of risk, but it’s worth listening to what people have to say. You might end up with a new perspective on someone you initially judged in an instant, or at least an interesting story to scare your parents with later. In an increasingly digital world, a bit of face-to-face interaction goes a long way.
